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THEATRE
 Koch
Up
Venue: On Broadway, 88 Shortmarket St, Cape Town. Tel: (021)
424 1194.
Time: Tue - Sat @ 8:30pm
Price: R85
Performances: 9 - 27 Jun 2009
Genre: Comedy
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Conrad Koch, SA’s numero uno comedy ventriloquist, brings
you his best show yet. He’s bribed his way into an MA in Anthropology.
He’s worked around the world. He’s entertained everyone from Saudi princes
to Free State gold miners. He’s directed here by theatrical genius
Heinrich Reisenhofer. The characters are being made by a small village of
people, headed by puppet prodigy Janni Younge. It’s awesome, except that
his puppets have joined a union and gone on strike. Damn.
Conrad wants to tell you that Jacob Zuma is actually just a nice guy with
a funny shaped head. He wants to get you to put yourself in other people’s
shoes, whether they fit or not. He wants to tell you that it’s all going
to be ok. But it’s not up to him. It’s up to a bad ass bunch of renegade
dummies who think he’s an idiot - and they want you to know it. Ronnie, a
green monster who Conrad raised since birth, is going to try to get you
into the sordid world of puppet porn.
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It’s cute and scary at the same time. But don’t worry.
Conrad keeps him chained, because if Ronnie gets loose it’s Conrad who
goes to prison. Chester, previously employed at SABC, has gone political
and wants control of the show to go back to the workers. Why should
puppets live in suitcases and when are they going to get medical benefits?
Other guest stars in the show include Julius Malema, the puppet. Every one
has one nowadays. This is the puppet who never made it into the Nandos ad.
Rejection hurts, especially if you are Julius. Tragic. There is also
Hilary the ostrich, socialite, and wannabe icon – she’s going to sing
whether you want her to or not. Conrad apologises before you even meet
her. She will harass everyone from women with bad taste to the man in the
jumper (so don’t wear a jumper).
We could tell you that Conrad has spent more than the entire Mpumalanga
anti-retroviral budget creating state of the art puppets. We could tell
you that this is one of SA’s most unique talents. But we won’t because
Debora Patta is watching, and she’s threatened to shut us down. You don’t
keep puppets in suitcases without consequences.
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